Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Welcome to the roller coaster

I did pretty good yesterday. I was feeling confident. Then this afternoon I started feeling some odd twinges and light cramping. So light that I probably wouldn't even notice it if I weren't dwelling on it. My mind says that it's just my uterus starting to expand. My heart says I am going to lose another baby. Seems there is no middle ground for me to just hold on and see what happens. It sucks, sucks, sucks that I can't just enjoy this pregnancy. I thought once I got pregnant that I would get off the roller coaster ride of ovulation and periods. Turns out I got on the far steeper roller coaster of daily TP checks and interpreting "twinges" and "cramps". Part of me just wants to go to sleep for the next 8 months and wake up to a healthy baby.

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