It's amazing to me what the human spirit is capable of; even my own. At the start of almost every cycle since the miscarriage I have been gripped by depression and the conviction that another pregnancy is never going to happen. By the time ovulation rolls around again, I have bounced back on the opposite high, convinced that this is going to be my cycle.
Here we go again. Last month I ovulated on CD20. Every cycle since the miscarriage has gotten longer and longer. Which I figured was probably a good thing since I ovulated on CD24 when I conceived the Little Miss and my cycles have always been long and irregular. So I figured I would ovulate even later this cycle. But I'm holding my breath now because I think I got a peak OPK today on CD17 and I've had what I'm pretty sure are ovulation pains this evening. Plus we've gotten plenty of work in the last few days and still have one more chance tomorrow before J heads off for another 4 dayer. See, I'm getting all optimistic again. Part of me thinks that just making the appointment with the OB is enough irony to get a BFP this month. We'll see. I'm not trusting my temps this time around since I've been somewhat sick with a sinus thing.
Care to join me on another 2 week roller coaster ride?!
Saturday, January 14, 2006
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