I met with a doula today. She seemed nice and I definitely plan to use her. I live in a smallish town and am related to people that everyone seems to know. That can be good or bad. I had debated on telling her who I was related to because she very likely knows my in-laws. Anyway, we were talking about water labor and births and she related a story about the politics of water birthing at our local hospital. Long story but the short of it is that she has a not-so-good opinion of someone and she wouldn't say names but I'm pretty sure it's my SIL. Time will tell whether that is a good thing or a bad thing. It makes life interesting anyway.
I'm all packed and ready to head out to Houston tomorrow. I'm dreading the actual mechanics of getting both of us and our luggage to the airport and then to my folks' house. I always dread the trip and it always ends up being okay in the end. The only trip that wasn't was the one where I decided it would be a good idea to take the toddler carseat on the airplane. That proved disastrous at the point where G decided she wasn't going to walk and then I couldn't carry both her and the carseat. She's old enough now to stay in her seat and we rent a seat with the car. I also bought a portable DVD player a few trips ago and every time with that she settles in to watch a movie and then promptly falls asleep. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed and taking a good book.
I wasn't able to cram my jacket in the suitcase so hopefully my sweaters will be enough. Houston is forecast to have highs in the 50s and 60s while we're there which should feel downright balmy after the 30s and 40s here.
Thursday night we're accomplishing two very important goals at once: we're meeting up with old friends and getting a Tex-Mex fix at our favorite restaurant. J is flying down after work to spend a few days with us which will be a treat as he will be working starting Christmas day.
Time to go check my packing list one more time to make sure I haven't missed anything important!
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Monday, December 18, 2006
20 Weeks: Halfway there!
Today marks the halfway point. Last night we had a gift exchange with my in-laws and the bottle of wine going around was too much to resist. Hello, my name is K and I had a few sips of wine while pregnant. But, given that it was a former OB doing the pouring and I didn't get any grief from my pediatrician sitting next to him, I enjoyed every sip I took!
I'm still not feeling much movement and that continues to bother me. At the ultrasound the baby was in a breech position and I think she stays there pretty consistently as most of the light kicks I feel are on the side where her feet were. And sometimes I feel her little head move on the other side.
Yesterday was my 38th birthday. J bought me a camera that I have been wanting, nay coveting, for quite some time now: a Canon Digital Rebel. Expensive as heck and much bulkier than point and shoot cameras but man is it sweet! The cool thing is that we have a film Canon with several lenses and those lenses fit the digital model as well. I can't wait to get the perfect Christmas shot of G with it!
Wednesday we start our trek across the country to visit the grandparents. G is very excited about it and I'm looking forward to the visit even if I'm not looking forward to the actual travel. The bad thing is that all three of us seem to be coming down with the crud. G has it today and I'm betting tomorrow it will be full-blown. Knock on wood, she's very good when she's sick; just a bit grumpy. So hopefully things will go okay. I remember traveling when I was pregnant with G and so many people went out of their way to be helpful. I'm counting on that this trip!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone.
I'm still not feeling much movement and that continues to bother me. At the ultrasound the baby was in a breech position and I think she stays there pretty consistently as most of the light kicks I feel are on the side where her feet were. And sometimes I feel her little head move on the other side.
Yesterday was my 38th birthday. J bought me a camera that I have been wanting, nay coveting, for quite some time now: a Canon Digital Rebel. Expensive as heck and much bulkier than point and shoot cameras but man is it sweet! The cool thing is that we have a film Canon with several lenses and those lenses fit the digital model as well. I can't wait to get the perfect Christmas shot of G with it!
Wednesday we start our trek across the country to visit the grandparents. G is very excited about it and I'm looking forward to the visit even if I'm not looking forward to the actual travel. The bad thing is that all three of us seem to be coming down with the crud. G has it today and I'm betting tomorrow it will be full-blown. Knock on wood, she's very good when she's sick; just a bit grumpy. So hopefully things will go okay. I remember traveling when I was pregnant with G and so many people went out of their way to be helpful. I'm counting on that this trip!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone.
Thursday, December 14, 2006
19w3d Ultrasound Part 2
How to convey the sense of relief I feel right now?
The ultrasound appt went well. We met first with a genetic counselor who took a health history and asked about all our family. The most challenging part of the whole day was laying out the family trees as she wanted to know about all J's sibbling's children and also all our aunts and uncles.
Then we did the actual ultrasound and I can't really say how long it took - 20 to 30 minutes I'd say. The sonographer was very good and talked to us the whole way through. She didn't tell us actual measurements of things but after every measurement she took she'd tell us what she was measuring and then say something like "That's right on target for an almost-20 week old baby". The baby cooperated beautifully. Just a few minutes into the ultrasound the tech brought up the image of the open legs and immediately said it was a girl. A little while later she got an even better view and you could clearly see the three lines. My placenta is indeed in the front which is obstructing some feeling of movements.
After the ultrasound J and I went out of for lunch and we were acting like two giddy teenagers! We talked some about the baby but we talked about a wide range of topics. It's been a while since we've done that. Probably almost 2 years. It hit me at one point how much this whole issue of getting and staying pregnant was weighing us and our relationship down. It's almost like a huge weight has been lifted off both of us. I realized that, regardless of the outcome, we're going to be okay. I can admit now that there have been times lately when I've wondered.
I was running errands this afternoon and I had my first person ask me "So when are you due?". Followed by the inevitable "Do you know if it's a girl or a boy?". I told him it would be our second girl and he then asked what I'm sure will be an oft-repeated question: "Did you want a boy?". I can honestly say that I am thrilled beyond belief to know it's a girl. Of course, I would have been happy with a boy. But I think deep down I wanted a little sister for my daughter. Plus, what would I do with all these girl clothes I've been accumulating?!!!
I think I will sleep much better tonight. I haven't had a really good night's sleep in a week or so and I'm sure it's been the anticipation of today. Hopefully it's all downhill from here!
The ultrasound appt went well. We met first with a genetic counselor who took a health history and asked about all our family. The most challenging part of the whole day was laying out the family trees as she wanted to know about all J's sibbling's children and also all our aunts and uncles.
Then we did the actual ultrasound and I can't really say how long it took - 20 to 30 minutes I'd say. The sonographer was very good and talked to us the whole way through. She didn't tell us actual measurements of things but after every measurement she took she'd tell us what she was measuring and then say something like "That's right on target for an almost-20 week old baby". The baby cooperated beautifully. Just a few minutes into the ultrasound the tech brought up the image of the open legs and immediately said it was a girl. A little while later she got an even better view and you could clearly see the three lines. My placenta is indeed in the front which is obstructing some feeling of movements.
After the ultrasound J and I went out of for lunch and we were acting like two giddy teenagers! We talked some about the baby but we talked about a wide range of topics. It's been a while since we've done that. Probably almost 2 years. It hit me at one point how much this whole issue of getting and staying pregnant was weighing us and our relationship down. It's almost like a huge weight has been lifted off both of us. I realized that, regardless of the outcome, we're going to be okay. I can admit now that there have been times lately when I've wondered.
I was running errands this afternoon and I had my first person ask me "So when are you due?". Followed by the inevitable "Do you know if it's a girl or a boy?". I told him it would be our second girl and he then asked what I'm sure will be an oft-repeated question: "Did you want a boy?". I can honestly say that I am thrilled beyond belief to know it's a girl. Of course, I would have been happy with a boy. But I think deep down I wanted a little sister for my daughter. Plus, what would I do with all these girl clothes I've been accumulating?!!!
I think I will sleep much better tonight. I haven't had a really good night's sleep in a week or so and I'm sure it's been the anticipation of today. Hopefully it's all downhill from here!
Monday, December 11, 2006
19 Weeks
One of my humorous tickers said this morning: "Only 20 more weeks until Mommy can enjoy a margarita.... or five". Yeah, right on course. I remember joking with J before G was born that we should bring a bottle of wine to the hospital to celebrate. We didn't but I finally got a glass just a few days after G was born. Wine never tasted so good. This time I'm serious about bringing wine. Or at least something alcoholic. The sad part is that my wine stash is seriously depleted right now and can one reasonably buy several cases of wine with a big huge belly? So I'm dropping big hints to J as to what this year's gifts should be.
I've pretty much lost my belly button. There is no mistaking by anyone now that this is a pregnant belly. Being only barely halfway through, it scares me to think how big this one is going to be. With G, I hid my condition at work until I was more than 6 months along. No chance of that this time!
I will be turning 38 on Sunday. That's getting awfully close to 40. I don't feel almost 40. I thought almost-40-year-olds were supposed to feel really mature and able to handle anything. I suppose that's what my kids will think about me. If they only knew!
I am looking forward to the ultrasound on Thursday with an equal mix of anticipation and dread. I feel some movement but not as much as I would like to. I'm hoping they'll tell me it's just because of the location of my placenta.
I've pretty much lost my belly button. There is no mistaking by anyone now that this is a pregnant belly. Being only barely halfway through, it scares me to think how big this one is going to be. With G, I hid my condition at work until I was more than 6 months along. No chance of that this time!
I will be turning 38 on Sunday. That's getting awfully close to 40. I don't feel almost 40. I thought almost-40-year-olds were supposed to feel really mature and able to handle anything. I suppose that's what my kids will think about me. If they only knew!
I am looking forward to the ultrasound on Thursday with an equal mix of anticipation and dread. I feel some movement but not as much as I would like to. I'm hoping they'll tell me it's just because of the location of my placenta.
Friday, December 08, 2006
Digital Musings
There are some professions that you just never quite get away from. You exist within that role 24 hours a day. Being a Mom comes to mind as one. Being a doctor is another. Countless times I've been with my BIL and SIL and seen them dealing with complete strangers who suddenly have need of medical advice because there's a doctor around. Believe it or not, being a computer professional is another. My speciality is programming internet applications. But as soon as people hear the word 'computer', all of a sudden I'm expected to be the master of all things computer and fix whatever problem has been bugging them lately. For those of you who are not very computer savvy, it's a bit like asking your dermatologist to diagnose the ringing in your ears. Fixing problems with the Windows operating system and associated applications is something that I can sometimes do under diress but definitely not something I enjoy.
Which is what made me groan especially loud last night when my desktop computer froze and won't boot past a blue screen of death now. There was a time in my life when I would have invested countless hours trying to diagnose and fix the problem. And there would have been more than a few swear words involved along the way. There was a time.... This is not the time. Hours and hours of uninterrupted computer time? Yeah, right. Fortunately I already have a laptop that can easily replace my desktop, although I will miss the convenience of being able to keep it upstairs and not have to tote it around. One of the applications I depend most upon is my financial tools and fortunately I had the foresight to have regularly backed up those files. I now have access to all my financial data with just a few days' gap on my laptop. Whew. I will definitely sleep better tonight. So now begins the painful process of getting all my most-used applications configured so that I can scan and print and stuff like that.
Now, being a computer professional, you'd think I would have meticulously kept data backups. Buzzzz.... Try again. I did back up my financial stuff because I think I would experience a complete nervous breakdown if I couldn't instantly pull up how much I spent at Target on the 12th of November in 1999. Seriously. I'm just that way. And I do have CD backups of all my pictures. Except the cute ones I had taken in the last few days. But what a pain in the butt to have to load all my backups onto the laptop and do I even have enough disk space to do that? So, lesson learned. I'm about to go consult Mr. Google right now about the best backup alternative. Once I buy something I plan to take it and the desktop to the local computer shop and pray that they can retrieve my data onto it.
This post has been provided as a cautionary tale. Everyone always tells you to back up and no one ever does it and then disaster inevitably strikes. Actually, I have been quite lucky: this is the first time that I have not been able to just transfer data from the old computer to the new one. But just a few months ago my Dad's disk croaked and he lost everything. If only I had learned from his experience. So please learn from mine!
Which is what made me groan especially loud last night when my desktop computer froze and won't boot past a blue screen of death now. There was a time in my life when I would have invested countless hours trying to diagnose and fix the problem. And there would have been more than a few swear words involved along the way. There was a time.... This is not the time. Hours and hours of uninterrupted computer time? Yeah, right. Fortunately I already have a laptop that can easily replace my desktop, although I will miss the convenience of being able to keep it upstairs and not have to tote it around. One of the applications I depend most upon is my financial tools and fortunately I had the foresight to have regularly backed up those files. I now have access to all my financial data with just a few days' gap on my laptop. Whew. I will definitely sleep better tonight. So now begins the painful process of getting all my most-used applications configured so that I can scan and print and stuff like that.
Now, being a computer professional, you'd think I would have meticulously kept data backups. Buzzzz.... Try again. I did back up my financial stuff because I think I would experience a complete nervous breakdown if I couldn't instantly pull up how much I spent at Target on the 12th of November in 1999. Seriously. I'm just that way. And I do have CD backups of all my pictures. Except the cute ones I had taken in the last few days. But what a pain in the butt to have to load all my backups onto the laptop and do I even have enough disk space to do that? So, lesson learned. I'm about to go consult Mr. Google right now about the best backup alternative. Once I buy something I plan to take it and the desktop to the local computer shop and pray that they can retrieve my data onto it.
This post has been provided as a cautionary tale. Everyone always tells you to back up and no one ever does it and then disaster inevitably strikes. Actually, I have been quite lucky: this is the first time that I have not been able to just transfer data from the old computer to the new one. But just a few months ago my Dad's disk croaked and he lost everything. If only I had learned from his experience. So please learn from mine!
Monday, December 04, 2006
18 Weeks
So here I am at 18 weeks. I've finally gotten all my maternity shirts out and washed. I have some non-maternity shirts that I can wear but most of them are too tight in the bust. I don't know what it is about maternity clothing but it really seems to accentuate the bump in front. I scored an awesome dress shirt at Goodwill the other day that will be perfect for holiday wearing. Last week I got a cheap black velvet maternity dress off of ebay but I don't know if I will end up wearing it or not. It depends on whether I'm able to find some maternity hose to go with it because I know there is no way in heck I could get on regular hose at this point!
At night I now sleep between 2 pillows. I am naturally a back sleeper so I learned with G to use pillows on either side; that way when I roll over I don't end up fully on my back. I also pulled out a stuffed animal (yes, I'm sleeping with a stuffed animal now!) that I bought with G that fits perfectly under my belly to make sleeping more comfortable.
I'm feeling the baby kick more now but only at night in bed or during the day when I sit quietly and feel for it.
Speaking of kicking, G kicked me very nicely in the belly today. Between those sorts of kicks and having to carry her around, it makes me amazed that any mom of a toddler can get through subsequent pregnancies. I still haven't told G about the baby but maybe she senses something because this week she started trying to relive her own baby-hood. She's always asking me to hold her sippy cup and feed her "like a baby" and today before naptime she wanted to sit in the chair and rock while she drank her milk. We haven't done that in ages and it made me as nostalgic as her for reliving old times. I'm beginning to understand why the baby of the family is just that - a baby. I anticipate that I will do everything I can to prolong every phase that the new baby goes through because I know it will be the last time for me to experience all of that.
J is gone again for an extended time. I probably won't see him for at least a week, maybe more. So I've already booked with the sitter for a "day off" this week. Next week: the big ultrasound. I received all the paperwork the other day and it was rather daunting to read it all. Depending on the outcome of the ultrasound, they can do an amnio right then and there if I choose. I truly hope I won't have to make that decision. I also hope that J will end up being in town because the only thing worse than having to make that decision would be to have to make it alone.
At night I now sleep between 2 pillows. I am naturally a back sleeper so I learned with G to use pillows on either side; that way when I roll over I don't end up fully on my back. I also pulled out a stuffed animal (yes, I'm sleeping with a stuffed animal now!) that I bought with G that fits perfectly under my belly to make sleeping more comfortable.
I'm feeling the baby kick more now but only at night in bed or during the day when I sit quietly and feel for it.
Speaking of kicking, G kicked me very nicely in the belly today. Between those sorts of kicks and having to carry her around, it makes me amazed that any mom of a toddler can get through subsequent pregnancies. I still haven't told G about the baby but maybe she senses something because this week she started trying to relive her own baby-hood. She's always asking me to hold her sippy cup and feed her "like a baby" and today before naptime she wanted to sit in the chair and rock while she drank her milk. We haven't done that in ages and it made me as nostalgic as her for reliving old times. I'm beginning to understand why the baby of the family is just that - a baby. I anticipate that I will do everything I can to prolong every phase that the new baby goes through because I know it will be the last time for me to experience all of that.
J is gone again for an extended time. I probably won't see him for at least a week, maybe more. So I've already booked with the sitter for a "day off" this week. Next week: the big ultrasound. I received all the paperwork the other day and it was rather daunting to read it all. Depending on the outcome of the ultrasound, they can do an amnio right then and there if I choose. I truly hope I won't have to make that decision. I also hope that J will end up being in town because the only thing worse than having to make that decision would be to have to make it alone.
Saturday, December 02, 2006
4 Months
There have been a number of people who ask me how far along I am and when I tell them the number of weeks, they immediately start converting it into months. Fortunately for my mathematical sanity, there are approximately 9 months between the beginning of August and the end of May. So it's pretty easy for me to approximate months, especially when I can't remember exactly the number of weeks I currently am. So at the end of November I completed four months of pregnancy. What's that phrase I so often bandy about? Oh yeah: I can't believe I made it this far. I'm almost halfway done. And only 12 more days until the definitive ultrasound. 4 Months. 5 to go.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
17w1d
At Thanksgiving dinner, a friend's mother came up to congratulate me on my good news. I said thank you but before I could even really think about it, I tempered it with "hopefully it will all work out". Being the wonderful woman that she is, she just smiled and said she hoped so too. I was thinking about the episode later, wondering at what point I will be able to accept that next May we might just be adding another child to our family. I kept thinking that if I got through the first few weeks without spotting, I would feel okay. Then I thought if I made it past the point of my first m/c I would feel okay. Then I thought I would feel better after my first midwife appointment. What I realized, in thinking about all this, is that, even at all those milestones, there was no great and sudden shift in the universe to make me all of a sudden say that things are okay. I think it has as much to do with reading others' stories of late losses and problems at birth than with my own m/c experiences. In that respect at least, the internet is probably hampering more than helping me. And yet, I wouldn't for the world trade the community of support I have found here.
In the end I've decided that the high-level ultrasound must be the deciding factor for me. I find myself looking forward to it with a mixture of dread and longing. But I've decided that if a specialist takes a look and can find nothing outwardly wrong with my baby, then I must accept that things are going to be okay. I'm going into it with this attitude and by golly I hope to come out of it with the same attitude!
Speaking of the ultrasound, I've moved it back a week. It was scheduled for the 6th at 8:30 in the morning which is on the early side for my household! Plus J informed me he would be out of town on an errand and my babysitter can't take G that early. So I called today and they were able to reschedule for 10:30 on the 14th. J will be home and we can leave G at the sitter's if we choose. Or we may take her with us. I will also be closer to 20 weeks at that point (19w3d) which will be better for them seeing more.
In the end I've decided that the high-level ultrasound must be the deciding factor for me. I find myself looking forward to it with a mixture of dread and longing. But I've decided that if a specialist takes a look and can find nothing outwardly wrong with my baby, then I must accept that things are going to be okay. I'm going into it with this attitude and by golly I hope to come out of it with the same attitude!
Speaking of the ultrasound, I've moved it back a week. It was scheduled for the 6th at 8:30 in the morning which is on the early side for my household! Plus J informed me he would be out of town on an errand and my babysitter can't take G that early. So I called today and they were able to reschedule for 10:30 on the 14th. J will be home and we can leave G at the sitter's if we choose. Or we may take her with us. I will also be closer to 20 weeks at that point (19w3d) which will be better for them seeing more.
Monday, November 27, 2006
17 Weeks
I had another midwife appointment today and all was well. A couple of things surprised me actually.
First off, I discovered that I have only gained 3 pounds since the last visit 4 weeks ago, which is well within the average of a pound a week during the second trimester. My total weight gain so far has only been 8 pounds. I'm happy with that. I still wish I had lost more prior to getting pregnant but I'll have plenty of time to worry about that later!
The second thing that surprised me was finding out how large my uterus is. At this point, it's just below my belly button. I don't know why but I thought it was far smaller. So now that I know that, I realize that I have been feeling quite a bit of movement (I dismissed most of what I was feeling because it was much higher up than I thought my uterus was).
The midwife talked to me about screening tests at this point, namely the AFP blood test. She said, given my age, it would very likely come back positive, since age is a factor in the equation for the test. She said if it did come back positive, the course of action would be a higher level ultrasound and possibly an amnio. I decided I didn't want to fool with the blood test since the results would be essentially meaningless. But I liked the idea of going straight for a high level ultrasound. These are done at the University hospital downtown and includes a consult with a perinatologist for the results. I opted for this route because I think (hope!) it will give me much more peace of mind to have someone looking at things who is more highly trained to spot problems. I can't honestly say at this point if I would do an amnio. I'm taking this one step at a time. Anyway, that is scheduled for 6 December, which is next week Wednesday when I will be 18 weeks.
That's about all I have to report. The visit was very boring and consisted mostly of discussions of what we did for Thanksgiving and what our Christmas plans are. Hopefully all my visits will be that inane!
First off, I discovered that I have only gained 3 pounds since the last visit 4 weeks ago, which is well within the average of a pound a week during the second trimester. My total weight gain so far has only been 8 pounds. I'm happy with that. I still wish I had lost more prior to getting pregnant but I'll have plenty of time to worry about that later!
The second thing that surprised me was finding out how large my uterus is. At this point, it's just below my belly button. I don't know why but I thought it was far smaller. So now that I know that, I realize that I have been feeling quite a bit of movement (I dismissed most of what I was feeling because it was much higher up than I thought my uterus was).
The midwife talked to me about screening tests at this point, namely the AFP blood test. She said, given my age, it would very likely come back positive, since age is a factor in the equation for the test. She said if it did come back positive, the course of action would be a higher level ultrasound and possibly an amnio. I decided I didn't want to fool with the blood test since the results would be essentially meaningless. But I liked the idea of going straight for a high level ultrasound. These are done at the University hospital downtown and includes a consult with a perinatologist for the results. I opted for this route because I think (hope!) it will give me much more peace of mind to have someone looking at things who is more highly trained to spot problems. I can't honestly say at this point if I would do an amnio. I'm taking this one step at a time. Anyway, that is scheduled for 6 December, which is next week Wednesday when I will be 18 weeks.
That's about all I have to report. The visit was very boring and consisted mostly of discussions of what we did for Thanksgiving and what our Christmas plans are. Hopefully all my visits will be that inane!
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
16 Weeks
Yesterday I sat down to write a post and realized that I couldn't think of anything to say that wasn't negative! J was gone for 11 days straight (5 on the job and 6 days on another project) and it was so much harder than I anticipated to be a single parent. I've learned lessons for any future occurrences of long absences, namely that I will schedule more time with the babysitter next time.
Pregnancy-wise, there is really not much to report. I have been feeling some movement for a week or so now. I still feel yucky most evenings and sometimes during the day. I'm not sure exactly how much weight I've gained but the scale was a little scary this morning as I haven't stepped on it in a while. I had hoped to keep my weight down this time around but I'm not sure that's going to happen. I don't feel like I'm eating a lot more but what I do eat is more calorie and carb-laden and I'm sure that's the cause of the pounds going on. I've had a lot of trouble sleeping at night but I suspect that has more to do with J's absence than the pregnancy. My next midwife appointment is next Monday and hopefully we'll schedule the "big" ultrasound then. I am going to push for sooner rather than later; I need to get it over and get the news that the baby is just fine and healthy.
While J was gone I got this notion that I needed a nice comfy chair for my bedroom. We don't have anything in the way of a chair in there so my reading and computer up there is all done on the bed. I've been wishing for something for a while now but the last few days I started to picture what I wanted. So last night I drug John to the Lazyboy store and spent $500 on the "best selling recliner in America". It's very soft and comfy and it rocks. J and a friend are picking it up for me today. I'll leave you with a funny story from the outing:
While we were in the chair store, G was running around having a grand time. We were the only ones in there (this is a great time of the year to shop apparently!). While I was paying, G ran up to J and announced in her loudest, most theatrical voice "I WENT POO-POO". Of course everyone in the store heard and smiled. So out to the car we went where I remembered that I had not one single diaper with me. Earlier that day we had taken a load of stuff to Goodwill and I took everything out of the car, including the diaper bag, but we had forgotten to put it back. Normally I carry an emergency diaper in my purse but I forgot to replace it from the last "emergency". So there we were, diaperless, with a toddler complaining that she was stinky. I knew there was a Target nearby and I normally use their brand of diapers so we decided to run in there. But we missed the turn. By this time G had decided she also needed more milk NOW and her cup was empty. So we drove to the next exit and I said surely there would be a drugstore there. Nope. Not a single one. So we finally ended up at a gas station where I paid $4.50 for 13 diapers (I normally pay $10 for 80 diapers!). But we had diapers and milk. So I went to change her. No poop. The diaper was barely wet. G was smiling this big smile. I'm pretty sure she knew the trouble she had caused. It turned out to be a good thing because after dinner we went to another store where she again loudly announced "I WENT POO-POO" and this time there was absolutely no argument that she had - the smell was potent.
Moral of the story: always replace your emergency diaper!
Pregnancy-wise, there is really not much to report. I have been feeling some movement for a week or so now. I still feel yucky most evenings and sometimes during the day. I'm not sure exactly how much weight I've gained but the scale was a little scary this morning as I haven't stepped on it in a while. I had hoped to keep my weight down this time around but I'm not sure that's going to happen. I don't feel like I'm eating a lot more but what I do eat is more calorie and carb-laden and I'm sure that's the cause of the pounds going on. I've had a lot of trouble sleeping at night but I suspect that has more to do with J's absence than the pregnancy. My next midwife appointment is next Monday and hopefully we'll schedule the "big" ultrasound then. I am going to push for sooner rather than later; I need to get it over and get the news that the baby is just fine and healthy.
While J was gone I got this notion that I needed a nice comfy chair for my bedroom. We don't have anything in the way of a chair in there so my reading and computer up there is all done on the bed. I've been wishing for something for a while now but the last few days I started to picture what I wanted. So last night I drug John to the Lazyboy store and spent $500 on the "best selling recliner in America". It's very soft and comfy and it rocks. J and a friend are picking it up for me today. I'll leave you with a funny story from the outing:
While we were in the chair store, G was running around having a grand time. We were the only ones in there (this is a great time of the year to shop apparently!). While I was paying, G ran up to J and announced in her loudest, most theatrical voice "I WENT POO-POO". Of course everyone in the store heard and smiled. So out to the car we went where I remembered that I had not one single diaper with me. Earlier that day we had taken a load of stuff to Goodwill and I took everything out of the car, including the diaper bag, but we had forgotten to put it back. Normally I carry an emergency diaper in my purse but I forgot to replace it from the last "emergency". So there we were, diaperless, with a toddler complaining that she was stinky. I knew there was a Target nearby and I normally use their brand of diapers so we decided to run in there. But we missed the turn. By this time G had decided she also needed more milk NOW and her cup was empty. So we drove to the next exit and I said surely there would be a drugstore there. Nope. Not a single one. So we finally ended up at a gas station where I paid $4.50 for 13 diapers (I normally pay $10 for 80 diapers!). But we had diapers and milk. So I went to change her. No poop. The diaper was barely wet. G was smiling this big smile. I'm pretty sure she knew the trouble she had caused. It turned out to be a good thing because after dinner we went to another store where she again loudly announced "I WENT POO-POO" and this time there was absolutely no argument that she had - the smell was potent.
Moral of the story: always replace your emergency diaper!
Monday, November 13, 2006
15 Weeks
Saturday night I was thinking to myself: I've been feeling pretty good lately, almost like my old self. I haven't felt nauseous or sick in several days! So don't you know that I got up Sunday feeling okay but shortly after breakfast I started feeling pretty bad. By the afternoon I was back to that pukey state. I don't think it was anything I ate but maybe that's a better explanation than "morning sickness" all over again. Today is going good so far but there's still a long ways to go in it.
My next midwife appt is two weeks from today. I'm starting to look forward to the "big" ultrasound. I'd like to know what sex the baby is. But I'm also hoping for some reassurance that there's nothing visibly wrong with the baby. I have never been able to shake the feeling that something might be chromosomally wrong with the baby and it just seems to get stronger as time goes on. I haven't really told anyone my fears because I know they'll be dismissed as my being.... I don't know - just a worry-wart I guess. But the fears are there and they keep me up at night. I have even done some research on amnios but I think in the end I would be too afraid to do it even though the m/c risks are pretty low. But I guess it depends on the outcome of the ultrasound. I hope to get that done the first week or two of December.
In other news, some demon possessed me last night and convinced me that G's hair needed another trim in the back. So I did that with decent results. Then I decided to trim her bangs. They looked okay right then but I was looking at them this morning and all I can say is that the demon possessed me and did a terrible job. And the worst thing is that I got them so short that, to even them up would require that there be pretty much nothing left of them. Note to self: never cut hair in that pukey state.
My next midwife appt is two weeks from today. I'm starting to look forward to the "big" ultrasound. I'd like to know what sex the baby is. But I'm also hoping for some reassurance that there's nothing visibly wrong with the baby. I have never been able to shake the feeling that something might be chromosomally wrong with the baby and it just seems to get stronger as time goes on. I haven't really told anyone my fears because I know they'll be dismissed as my being.... I don't know - just a worry-wart I guess. But the fears are there and they keep me up at night. I have even done some research on amnios but I think in the end I would be too afraid to do it even though the m/c risks are pretty low. But I guess it depends on the outcome of the ultrasound. I hope to get that done the first week or two of December.
In other news, some demon possessed me last night and convinced me that G's hair needed another trim in the back. So I did that with decent results. Then I decided to trim her bangs. They looked okay right then but I was looking at them this morning and all I can say is that the demon possessed me and did a terrible job. And the worst thing is that I got them so short that, to even them up would require that there be pretty much nothing left of them. Note to self: never cut hair in that pukey state.
Friday, November 10, 2006
Vacation Anyone?
I've always worked at places where taking vacation is no big deal. Some places there was so much to do that more than a day of vacation at a time was out of the question. Other places you simply let it be known that you would be off on certain dates and as long as it didn't interfere with projects, it was okay.
Enter my rude introduction to the airline world, where schedules are apparently made months, nay, years in advance. Never mind that the company can't give us next month's schedule before the 20th of the previous month; they want us to know exactly when we're going to want to vacate a year in advance. In November of each month J gets his "vacation bid pack" which is required to be turned in by November 20th. We're supposed to fill out 3 choices for each week of vacation (he's up to 3 weeks now, thank goodness!). It seems to have become a tradition to take a ski vacation in February so that's one week accounted for. There is always much debate over the remaining two weeks. He always requests Christmas week but never gets it.
Of course, the conversation this year had to include what may or may not happen around the first of May. All along I've fought to keep myself from looking too far into the future; from anticipating too strongly what might happen. But the stupid vacation bid pack forced my hand. So we had to discuss in great detail when I am due (7 May), when I think it most likely to happen (Gracie was a week early so I'm betting more like 1 May), and when I need J there.
When G was born, it worked out beautifully. He got home one evening from a trip and she was born about 24 hours later. I think the trip he came off of was a 3 day trip and both nights he spent in Canada where his cell phone doesn't work. I realized later that I had no idea how to get ahold of him had I needed to. He ended up being off for almost 2 weeks after G was born. I asked him if he could be off more like 4 weeks this time and he just looked at me.
So I've officially started thinking about what life might be like when this baby arrives. It's scary. I don't think it was this scary with G because I had no idea what I was in for. Now I'm anticipating the sleep deprivation, the depression, the sore boobs.... all of that magnified by having to care for a toddler at the same time. So the question that keeps bouncing around in my head right now: WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING?
Enter my rude introduction to the airline world, where schedules are apparently made months, nay, years in advance. Never mind that the company can't give us next month's schedule before the 20th of the previous month; they want us to know exactly when we're going to want to vacate a year in advance. In November of each month J gets his "vacation bid pack" which is required to be turned in by November 20th. We're supposed to fill out 3 choices for each week of vacation (he's up to 3 weeks now, thank goodness!). It seems to have become a tradition to take a ski vacation in February so that's one week accounted for. There is always much debate over the remaining two weeks. He always requests Christmas week but never gets it.
Of course, the conversation this year had to include what may or may not happen around the first of May. All along I've fought to keep myself from looking too far into the future; from anticipating too strongly what might happen. But the stupid vacation bid pack forced my hand. So we had to discuss in great detail when I am due (7 May), when I think it most likely to happen (Gracie was a week early so I'm betting more like 1 May), and when I need J there.
When G was born, it worked out beautifully. He got home one evening from a trip and she was born about 24 hours later. I think the trip he came off of was a 3 day trip and both nights he spent in Canada where his cell phone doesn't work. I realized later that I had no idea how to get ahold of him had I needed to. He ended up being off for almost 2 weeks after G was born. I asked him if he could be off more like 4 weeks this time and he just looked at me.
So I've officially started thinking about what life might be like when this baby arrives. It's scary. I don't think it was this scary with G because I had no idea what I was in for. Now I'm anticipating the sleep deprivation, the depression, the sore boobs.... all of that magnified by having to care for a toddler at the same time. So the question that keeps bouncing around in my head right now: WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING?
Monday, November 06, 2006
14 Weeks: Plump or Pregnant?
I have a page with some pregnancy tickers from various sites, including a humorous one from baby-gaga.net that today says "Just plump or pregnant? Other people are noticing and deciding whether to ask my Mommy this risky question". As far as I know there is still a baby in there but all I really feel is plump. Very plump. Still feeling a bit yucky in the evenings. The boobs, though.... the boobs are getting me. Over the last week or two I have occasionally felt the tingling sensation that always used to accompany milk let-down when I was nursing G. The first time it caught me really off-guard until I remembered that I had felt it before. The other night we went out to dinner and across the restaurant I saw a couple with a crying newborn. I was listening to the conversation and not really even thinking about the baby when all of a sudden I realized that things were getting tingly. It scared me because I fully expected to look down and see two wet spots on my shirt. I had a terrible problem for about the first six months with leaking, although never before I gave birth. I haven't leaked anything yet but I started carrying pads around just in case. I guess part of the reason it scares me is that I now know that if something happened at this point I'd have to deal with milk coming in which was never a problem with my other m/c.
Other than that, I'm starting to get my energy back and I no longer have to deal with real nausea. I can eat pretty much anything now although I am particularly partial to the hot and spicy stuff. I won't say I crave it but I tend towards it. I still don't feel like I've really connected with this little one. I still check the TP every single time but I think I'm not quite as sure I'm going to see something. I haven't touched my handheld doppler in several weeks.
In other news, J went to the dentist this morning and, being the juvenile that he can sometimes be, I had to go with him. Which is fine because everyone there loves seeing G and is always disappointed if one of us comes alone. This time she took much more of an interest in the cleaning and afterwards she sat in the chair and the dentist looked at her teeth. Of course, we then had the dreaded "it's time for the binky to go" conversation. Although he did say her bite was a little worse than would normally be caused by periodic binky use. He said she may end up with braces no matter what but we should still say goodbye to the binky. She can usually only have it in the car and at sleep times. So we "lost" it on the way out to the car and she had a good cry all the way home about that. J wanted me to immediately go cold turkey on it but I said absolutely not. I'm leaving her tomorrow for the day with a new babysitter and I refuse to try that without a binky! So we'll start on Wednesday. Life is about to get much harder for a while. Hopefully cheaper in the long-run (sans braces) but much, much harder on me.
Other than that, I'm starting to get my energy back and I no longer have to deal with real nausea. I can eat pretty much anything now although I am particularly partial to the hot and spicy stuff. I won't say I crave it but I tend towards it. I still don't feel like I've really connected with this little one. I still check the TP every single time but I think I'm not quite as sure I'm going to see something. I haven't touched my handheld doppler in several weeks.
In other news, J went to the dentist this morning and, being the juvenile that he can sometimes be, I had to go with him. Which is fine because everyone there loves seeing G and is always disappointed if one of us comes alone. This time she took much more of an interest in the cleaning and afterwards she sat in the chair and the dentist looked at her teeth. Of course, we then had the dreaded "it's time for the binky to go" conversation. Although he did say her bite was a little worse than would normally be caused by periodic binky use. He said she may end up with braces no matter what but we should still say goodbye to the binky. She can usually only have it in the car and at sleep times. So we "lost" it on the way out to the car and she had a good cry all the way home about that. J wanted me to immediately go cold turkey on it but I said absolutely not. I'm leaving her tomorrow for the day with a new babysitter and I refuse to try that without a binky! So we'll start on Wednesday. Life is about to get much harder for a while. Hopefully cheaper in the long-run (sans braces) but much, much harder on me.
Thursday, November 02, 2006
13w3d
I'm finally getting over my cold/sinus. I broke down the other night and took a Tylenol. With G, I never took any medication (Tums doesn't count, does it?!). I feel like this poor kid is already getting second best treatment. You always hear stories of parents who coddle the first child, sanitizing the binky if it so much as touches the floor; then the second child gets the binky if it falls within the 5 or 10 second rule. I know that's going to be me. Although I was fairly laid back with G as far as things like that, I was just as uptight about sleep with her. Early on I got her in a routine and woe to the person that got in the way of that. I know it's going to be much harder to balance a toddler and an infant, so life should be interesting.
G had a great time with Halloween. She quickly got into the concept of ringing doorbells and saying "trick or treat", although she still doesn't understand why, when someone opened the door, she couldn't go in the house! I think she also didn't really "get" that the stuff in her pumpkin was candy. When she got home I let her eat a small thing of M&Ms and then sorted out the rest of the stuff, thinking to keep some for when she asked for it later. She has been happily playing with the pumpkin since then but has never asked for the candy. So this year J and I get the loot all to ourselves! I'm sure next year she'll be wiser.
G had a great time with Halloween. She quickly got into the concept of ringing doorbells and saying "trick or treat", although she still doesn't understand why, when someone opened the door, she couldn't go in the house! I think she also didn't really "get" that the stuff in her pumpkin was candy. When she got home I let her eat a small thing of M&Ms and then sorted out the rest of the stuff, thinking to keep some for when she asked for it later. She has been happily playing with the pumpkin since then but has never asked for the candy. So this year J and I get the loot all to ourselves! I'm sure next year she'll be wiser.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
13w1d
I forgot to say in yesterday's post that I really like the midwife. I had some reservations going into it but they were quickly dispelled. She came across as very competent and confident. She seems like the type that will be very reassuring but will tell things the way they are with no beating around the bush.
I feel somewhat better today from my cold/sinus. It always holds true for me when I get this type of thing that the better I get to feeling, the worse I sound. And of course, I have 10 people on my list that I have been needing to make phone calls to about various things and I really wanted to get that knocked out today. I made a couple of the most pressing calls but it was frustrating for both parties as I really have no voice to speak of (pun intended). One of the calls on my list is to follow up with my insurance company about their investigations into payment of my HSG. If you remember the saga, my OB's office billed it incorrectly (I'm pretty sure) resulting in the claim being denied by the insurance company. I finally was able to find someone at the insurance company who sent my paperwork in for review by some in-house committee. Since I've heard nothing back from it, I don't hold a whole lot of hope of them finding in my favor. In the meantime I am paying the almost $1000 bill in $25/month installments! At some point I'll get tired of the monthly bills and just pay the darn thing off but maybe in the meantime my account will get marked as paid or something; never hurts to hope. The fire is under me to follow up with the insurance company because J's employer is switching providers at the beginning of the year so I want to have an answer before they do that. The switch should prove interesting as far as the pregnancy care goes. With G, the midwife's office didn't bill until after the birth for any of my prenatal visits or ultrasounds. With both my m/c, I didn't get billed until well after the fact. So I will have to have this midwife's office do some fancy footwork and hopefully it won't be a problem.
I'm not big into Halloween. Yesterday we told G we'd be going trick-or-treating today. She has absolutely no clue what this activity involves but she can't stop talking about it. She doesn't even know that it involves candy or dressing up!
I feel somewhat better today from my cold/sinus. It always holds true for me when I get this type of thing that the better I get to feeling, the worse I sound. And of course, I have 10 people on my list that I have been needing to make phone calls to about various things and I really wanted to get that knocked out today. I made a couple of the most pressing calls but it was frustrating for both parties as I really have no voice to speak of (pun intended). One of the calls on my list is to follow up with my insurance company about their investigations into payment of my HSG. If you remember the saga, my OB's office billed it incorrectly (I'm pretty sure) resulting in the claim being denied by the insurance company. I finally was able to find someone at the insurance company who sent my paperwork in for review by some in-house committee. Since I've heard nothing back from it, I don't hold a whole lot of hope of them finding in my favor. In the meantime I am paying the almost $1000 bill in $25/month installments! At some point I'll get tired of the monthly bills and just pay the darn thing off but maybe in the meantime my account will get marked as paid or something; never hurts to hope. The fire is under me to follow up with the insurance company because J's employer is switching providers at the beginning of the year so I want to have an answer before they do that. The switch should prove interesting as far as the pregnancy care goes. With G, the midwife's office didn't bill until after the birth for any of my prenatal visits or ultrasounds. With both my m/c, I didn't get billed until well after the fact. So I will have to have this midwife's office do some fancy footwork and hopefully it won't be a problem.
I'm not big into Halloween. Yesterday we told G we'd be going trick-or-treating today. She has absolutely no clue what this activity involves but she can't stop talking about it. She doesn't even know that it involves candy or dressing up!
Monday, October 30, 2006
13 Weeks
Nausea: check
Weight gain: check
Big boobs: check
Feeling fat: check
Yup, I still get to feeling yucky in the evenings. But I think each day it gets a little easier.
I had my first appointment with the midwife today. It's a pretty low-tech operation; she doesn't have a nurse assisting or anything. So when you come in, they hand you your chart and you go in the back and record your weight and the results of your urine's protein and glucose check. I was there for almost an hour and a half. First I filled out all the requisite paperwork. Then I met with the midwife to go over my health history. Then she did a physical exam and pap smear. Oh joy. She told me that my cervix "wanted to bleed" and that I would most likely see some spotting from that but not to worry. I have seen a bit since then and am very proud of myself for not freaking out about it. She also listened for the heartbeat and found it as soon as she put the monitor on my belly. It was ranging about 160 beats per minute.
My folks have been visiting since last Wednesday and, between that and catching G's cold, I've not been at my best. But I'm on the down-side of the cold and my folks leave tomorrow, so hopefully things will get better.
Weight gain: check
Big boobs: check
Feeling fat: check
Yup, I still get to feeling yucky in the evenings. But I think each day it gets a little easier.
I had my first appointment with the midwife today. It's a pretty low-tech operation; she doesn't have a nurse assisting or anything. So when you come in, they hand you your chart and you go in the back and record your weight and the results of your urine's protein and glucose check. I was there for almost an hour and a half. First I filled out all the requisite paperwork. Then I met with the midwife to go over my health history. Then she did a physical exam and pap smear. Oh joy. She told me that my cervix "wanted to bleed" and that I would most likely see some spotting from that but not to worry. I have seen a bit since then and am very proud of myself for not freaking out about it. She also listened for the heartbeat and found it as soon as she put the monitor on my belly. It was ranging about 160 beats per minute.
My folks have been visiting since last Wednesday and, between that and catching G's cold, I've not been at my best. But I'm on the down-side of the cold and my folks leave tomorrow, so hopefully things will get better.
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
12w2d: Expecting
The other day I got a craving for a pasta dish I used to make a lot. It's a very simple concoction of pasta, tomatoes, olives, and spinach. And my favorite part: crushed red pepper flakes. J has never really liked the dish because he says I always overdo the red pepper. So I made it night before last. I put in all the ingredients, including the red pepper. I stirred it up and decided it looked like it needed just a dash more red peppers. Well, my hand must have slipped or something because that's by far the hottest I've ever made it. But it wasn't too hot to eat and I was really craving it, so I ate it. Boy was that a bad idea. I paid for that all night long. Tums didn't even touch my heartburn. Not being one to really learn from my mistakes, I decided the dish would be good for lunch today. I swear I did not put that many red peppers in it. But hello heartburn. I feel condemned to spend the next 6 months eating bland food, which is a heavy sentence indeed to someone who once ate Tex-Mex for every meal straight for a week, mostly for the hot sauce.
So now I'm sitting here with a nauseas stomach and heartburn and my folks are due to arrive in about an hour. And I've volunteered to have supper ready. File that under the "What was I thinking" category. The good news is that they'll be here a little less than a week and we eat most meals out with them here. So no more cooking for me for a while.
Subject change....
I was in the dressing room at the Y this morning and I overheard a young girl ask an obviously pregnant woman "Are you going to have a baby?". That made me stop and think. What would I answer if she had asked me? Something along the lines of... well, I'm pregnant but I don't know for sure that I'm actually going to have a baby. And then, for some reason, I brought to mind the term that my folks tend to use: expecting. All of a sudden I saw that term in a whole different light and realized how apt it is. I'm expecting a baby. So much hope and expectations beneath the surface. I don't know how it will all play out. But right now I'm expecting. Trying to expect good things. Trying to anticipate the best. But not really knowing.
I'm expecting.
So now I'm sitting here with a nauseas stomach and heartburn and my folks are due to arrive in about an hour. And I've volunteered to have supper ready. File that under the "What was I thinking" category. The good news is that they'll be here a little less than a week and we eat most meals out with them here. So no more cooking for me for a while.
Subject change....
I was in the dressing room at the Y this morning and I overheard a young girl ask an obviously pregnant woman "Are you going to have a baby?". That made me stop and think. What would I answer if she had asked me? Something along the lines of... well, I'm pregnant but I don't know for sure that I'm actually going to have a baby. And then, for some reason, I brought to mind the term that my folks tend to use: expecting. All of a sudden I saw that term in a whole different light and realized how apt it is. I'm expecting a baby. So much hope and expectations beneath the surface. I don't know how it will all play out. But right now I'm expecting. Trying to expect good things. Trying to anticipate the best. But not really knowing.
I'm expecting.
Monday, October 23, 2006
12 Weeks
On the home front, we had a wonderful time on our anniversary trip. J ended up getting off of work a little early so we were able to spend time together Friday night. Our trip to Cincinnati was very relaxing and refreshing. We found the motorcycle shop and got J outfitted from head to toe! He was so excited that he honestly couldn't sleep Saturday night. He is out today looking at a motorcycle to buy that I fully expect he will bring home. The insurance cost caught me a bit by surprise though. $150 a year to insure him. As with most things in our budget, it's not a huge amount but conspires with everything else to add up after a while. I came home to the hugest hug I've ever gotten from G although I found out that the runny nose she had Friday night turned into a full-blown cold over the weekend. But my friend said it didn't slow her down a bit except to wipe her nose every now and then. She had a lot of fun but I think she was glad to see me.
On the baby front, I'm hanging in there. I actually haven't had time recently to try my doppler although I hope to tonight. Most evenings I still have a bit of nausea although it's manageable and I'm able to eat a wider range of foods now. I almost hesitate to write this but this is the place where I deal with my feelings so here goes: Over the recent weeks I've gotten rather pessimistic about this pregnancy. I thought my feelings would turn more optimistic over time but they haven't. I just can't get into the mind-set that this pregnancy is going to work out. I don't feel any of the things I did with G. I don't feel like I am carrying around a new little life. I just feel like I'm getting fat. It's hard to explain really. Sometimes I am really convinced that there's something wrong with the baby and that sooner or later we are going to find it out. Until then, I feel like I'm just biding my time. Sometimes I even catch myself making mental plans about what I'm going to do after all this is over and it's down to the three of this. I suspect that these feelings are related to my lurking depression. Some might be tempted to tell me to just shrug them off, think positively. But it just doesn't work that way. All I feel like I can do right now is try to get through with the least impact on those around me. That's where I am at this moment. I hope it changes for the better and soon!
I have to get on to my next task which is wrapping Christmas gifts. There's probably something fundamentally wrong about wrapping Christmas gifts in October. Even if it is cold outside and snow was flurrying this morning. But my folks are coming in tomorrow and I need to have all this stuff ready to send back with them. Ho Ho Ho!
On the baby front, I'm hanging in there. I actually haven't had time recently to try my doppler although I hope to tonight. Most evenings I still have a bit of nausea although it's manageable and I'm able to eat a wider range of foods now. I almost hesitate to write this but this is the place where I deal with my feelings so here goes: Over the recent weeks I've gotten rather pessimistic about this pregnancy. I thought my feelings would turn more optimistic over time but they haven't. I just can't get into the mind-set that this pregnancy is going to work out. I don't feel any of the things I did with G. I don't feel like I am carrying around a new little life. I just feel like I'm getting fat. It's hard to explain really. Sometimes I am really convinced that there's something wrong with the baby and that sooner or later we are going to find it out. Until then, I feel like I'm just biding my time. Sometimes I even catch myself making mental plans about what I'm going to do after all this is over and it's down to the three of this. I suspect that these feelings are related to my lurking depression. Some might be tempted to tell me to just shrug them off, think positively. But it just doesn't work that way. All I feel like I can do right now is try to get through with the least impact on those around me. That's where I am at this moment. I hope it changes for the better and soon!
I have to get on to my next task which is wrapping Christmas gifts. There's probably something fundamentally wrong about wrapping Christmas gifts in October. Even if it is cold outside and snow was flurrying this morning. But my folks are coming in tomorrow and I need to have all this stuff ready to send back with them. Ho Ho Ho!
Friday, October 20, 2006
11w4d: Free!
I feel a certain amount of guilt when I say that I am free for the next 48 hours. My good friend just came and left with my daughter. No matter how much I love my daughter, I have to admit that the prospect of 48 hours without her makes me ecstatic. Of course I will miss her smile and her laugh and her witty conversation. On the flip side... no diapers, no whining, no spanking, no Barney. Perhaps not the fairest of trades but I'm muddling through. J and I are supposed to leave bright and early tomorrow morning to head for a nearby city. He doesn't know this but I plan to take him to a motorcycle apparal shop and let him shop to his heart's content. I hope he finds something because that's my anniversary gift. You'd think 10 years would warrant a more exciting present but that's the best I could come up with. At the moment, however, his flight is delayed and it's looking more and more like he might not be able to get home tonight. The best laid plans.... At any rate, we'll end up at a swank hotel tomorrow night (hopefully) and revel in being childless once more. Until we start to miss it and decide to come home!
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